Tonight...I was an Ostrich

We all deal with the struggles life gives us in our own unique ways. Some avoid issues like an ostrich with their head in the sand. Some bulldoze over them, thinking that shear force of will, will over come any obstacle. Some think, analyzing every angle to come up with a "rational" and "reasonable" way to deal with a situation. Some simply "go with the flow" figuring everything will work out as it will so why bother. Before MS I tended to fall into the "bulldoze" category. No problem couldn't be solved through sheer will and all the effort it required. Defeat wasn't an option. However, like I said, that was BEFORE MS. Before MS sapped all my energy. Now I'm lucky if I have the energy to be an ostrich! My Primary Health Care Physician make a house call this evening. Can you imagine. How awesome is that? She brought over the paperwork I need for the airlines to fly with my Rebif as well as the machine for my treatment in Texas so I can carry it with me and not check it as luggage. (Can you imagine my fit if they lost it?!?!) She sat, we chatted. She was actually here for quite awhile. I was up and down with my cane. Nothing unusual. Then she said to me, "Where is your walker"? Of course, like the ostrich my head immediately went DEEP into the sand and I replied, "In my bedroom". She replied, "Not going to do you much good there". All I could do at that point is nod my head and SIT. Darned if I got up the rest of the time she was here! I know I'm wobbly. I get that way now and then :)~ It's been a rough summer. I've gone from using the cane very intermittently in April to full time cane and part time walker in September. Big change....but....as challenging as this summer has been I learned a lot about ME. My strengths and weaknesses. I learned it's OK, (OK is explained in a previous blog), and part of being OK means that sometimes it's OK to be an ostrich.