Thursday, January 08, 2009

When is enough....enough?

As I sit here at 6:30 in the morning eating a warm slice of freshly baked bread (tells you how long I've already been up) slathered (is that a word?) with butter, I wonder exactly when is enough.....enough. We all know when we go over the limit consuming food (especially when it's fresh out of the oven), alcohol, chocolate (is there EVER enough Chocolate?) and all the other wonderful things and not so wonderful things, we enjoy. I think "enough" of those things are pretty clear, as are the consequences. The "enough" I'm talking about is more decision based. When are the negative side effects enough to make you stop taking a medication, even though you know it's absolutely a necessity. (Yep last night was shot night). At what point do you admit the stress of a job is actually harming your health and scream "enough"? I believe MSers are really strong fighters. We don't have a choice. It's either fight or curl up in a fetal position and give up. I've never met, or talked to an MSer that gave up the fight against the disease. Of course, we all get frustrated. If your an MSer with balance problems going out to dinner can become an embarassing ordeal. When get up after your meal your likely to walk out of the restaurant weaving. You just know folks are thinking you've had "a few too many" when you may not have had even a glass of wine with dinner. You see the looks as you pass. It can be embarrassing. You're trying your best to walk and everyone thinks your intoxicated. It's enough to make you stay home for dinner. Then you realize that you rarely go out anymore. It's to embarrassing if you wobble, your tired of the rudeness of the stares and actual comments, (I've read about the experiences some of you have shared on your blogs) and it's too much work if your in a chair. THAT'S when enough IS enough. Yep, I have MS. So the heck what? While MS isn't exactly a walk in the park its not nearly as bad as some of the other diseases out there I could have been diagnosed with. I have TWO friends battling cancer, a friend who's had a stroke (VERY YOUNG), and yet another with a serious form of hepatitis. So, when is enough...enough? When your feeling sorry for yourself and throwing an extended pity party and you refuse to either pull yourself out of it or get help. That's enough. When you allow the rudeness and insensitivity of others to make you feel you should isolate yourself, that's enough. When you want to give up and won't extend the many hands being extended to in friendship...that's enough.
Live is meant to be LIVED not merely endured. So live it to it's fullest even if you weave when you walk or roll to your destination.

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