Wednesday, June 17, 2009

"You look better than I thought you would"

were the first words out of my Neurologists mouth today when he saw me. I chose to take it as a compliment and wondered how BAD I must really have been when I had my exacerbation in April. Of course, you know, MD's being MD's, they aren't going to throw you a bone without at least attempting to take it away. I just had to wait. I didn't have to wait long. He began grabbing at the bone with the question, "When did the foot drop start"? (I didn't have it prior to the April exacerbation or while I was in the Hospital for that matter). I explained that it started in rehab, hence the brace etc. He started tugging on the bone when he asked me to take my shoes and socks off, and he positively wrestled the bone away when he told me to close my eyes and tell him when I could feel him touch my feet. I had no problem feeling him touch my right foot. I kept WAITING for him to touch my left foot ANYWHERE. The longer I waited to worse I knew it really was. I've never met an MD that has enough of a sense of humor to make a patient wait for the touch and then yell "Gottcha, I haven't touched you yet" when you say you didn't feel anything. Sure enough, turns out my left leg/foot is worse than even I knew. I have zero....nada feeling in it (unless of course you count those horrendous bouts of spascity I have. Then the bloody foot has PLENTY of freaking feeling). End result. Request to insurance company for electric wheelchair and UCLA consult for Tysabri. SO, all in all a mixed review. However, getting back to his statement of "You look better than I thought you would". I really wanted to say, "Damn straight I do, and don't ever count me down and out again. I will NOT be defeated by this damn disease, I will continue to push myself harder than I should and risk my husbands' wrath (sorry honey) as well as the worry my friends before I give up. BECAUSE THAT'S WHO I AM AND WHAT I'M MADE OUT OF". Of course, I didn't I nodded my head at all the appropriate points shook his hand and made my follow-up appointment for three weeks.


Herrad said...

Hi Kimberly,

Good post you go for it.


Kimberly said...

Thanks Herrad. We all just have to keep taking it one day at a time!